Tuesday, September 6, 2011

A small update

First- let me thank you all for the incredible outpouring of love and support over this past weekend. It was some of the hardest days I have ever faced. But with the help of Sweetness and my mom I have survived and am sitting here at work.

I did want to keep you all updated on what the goings on are. Yesterday I texted her and asked her if she would at least give me and/or the birth father the courtesy of knowing when she went into labor so we could be at the birth and she said yes. She said he next Dr appt is Sept. 15 and we can get a better update then. She keeps saying she may have to have a c-section and she would let us know the date and time. You know everything she says is tempered with a whole lot of distrust. She then told me how sorry she was and that she was an immature b**** and she wanted to change. I told her she did not have act this way and she could let this be a happy ending if she would allow it. She also said Catholic charities said the father could fight for the baby, but he does not have a home or resources to care for her at all.

So fast forward to today and my attorney finally called me back. She said that if we can be at the birth, she can draft documents allowing us to take the baby from the hospital and as long as the father accompanies us over state lines we can bring the baby here to Virginia and adopt her here. This is all contingent of course on her signing her rights away in the hospital. Also my attorney said catholic charities is notorious for being VERY aggressive with trying to get custody of the baby as soon as the baby is born. She also said the baby could end up in foster care for awhile and a judge may have to decide who gets the baby. I just do not have the time or money or emotional energy to fight the legal system that way. I just don't.

So I texted her back this afternoon and told her the scenario with foster care and all that, and I begged her to call off the situation with catholic charities. I told her if she cared at all about that baby- she would not use her as a pawn, like some rag doll to passed around, when she could be loved and in her bed very soon after birth if she would stop the games. She SAID she would call it off with catholic charities. Now whether she will or not - who knows but she said she wanted us to raise her and that she would cooperate for us to get her. I told her she has made a lot of mistakes and hurt us greatly but she can do right by us and her daughter by making sure we get her and she needs to do everything possible to ensure we can adopt her without making us go broke. I said a bunch of other stuff, but for brevity's sake, you get the picture.

So I have no idea what will happen from here. I am going to keep in touch with her daily on a limited basis just so i can find out when she goes into labor so we can get there. In about 2 weeks I will have the car packed with the carseat, bottles, formula, clothes, pacis, etc. and we will make a beeline to Pennsylvania when we get the call , and I guess my maternity leave with my job will begin then.

I still covet your prayers and your love as we wait so anxiously as to what our lives are going to be. I love that baby already and I guess that is why this hurts so badly.

Thank you all again.