Meditation CDs from Circle and Bloom

I have mentioned several times that I am doing a meditation CD set to try to relax and reduce my stress this cycle. Several of you have written and asked me for the name and I keep meaning to do a post about it- so here goes.....

The picture above is a shot of the CD set cover and I can not say enough wonderful things about this program. It is a 4 CD set from Circle&Bloom and they have a guided meditation that you listen to every day of your cycle from 3 Pre-cycle days all the way through the beta test, even special ones for the dreaded 2ww! So basically about 18 sessions, 2-days for each session.

I HIGHLY recommend this to women who are looking for ways to increase their IVF /IUI success and maybe can not afford acupuncture or other methods. The whole set was $69, and is fully refundable if you are not satisfied. You can download them or purchase the CDs, and it s made so that the Egg retrieval and transfer sessions can be listened to during the actual procedure! How cool!!!??? I really love them- they are not too long (about 13 mins each) and they are SOOOO relaxing I end up falling asleep. Which probably is not the best because you need to be awake to get the full benefit.

If you are interested in purchasing them please go to this website: Circle and Bloom.

Good luck my friends- and baby dust to you all!

Stimming Day 5

So after 5 days of stimming with 350 units of Folli.stim and 2 vials of Repro.nex each evening-My ovaries look something like this. Full of follicles!!! My estradiol today was 573 up from 202 on Tuesday!!! Its still rising nicely. The US this morning was pretty good- my lining is looking great (3 layers like they want) and the follies were about 10-12 mm, and it was estimated that I had 8-9 follicles that were big and right on track. We compared to the last cycle n this same day of that cycle and my estradiol was lower than today and I also have several more follies than I did then.

So we are trucking along- staying on the same doses of meds each morning and night and we will check back in on Saturday morning. It looks like they will be harvesting the eggs on Tuesday and embryo transfer on Sunday. This is perfect timing because I am throwing my girlfriend Amanda a baby shower in my house on Saturday Feb. 26, it would really not be a good thing if my transfer fell on that day.

I will take pictures when that time gets here so you can see the shower. I am actually doing okay with this, not emotional about it- just happy to bless a friend who I know would do the same for me if it actually was me.

We will go in on Saturday again and I will let you know then what the verdict is!!!!!

The eggs are percolating!!!

This morning at the clinic- I went in for my first follicle (egg) check of this cycle- and the bleeding had stopped completely!! So I am so relieved to not have to deal with that.

The US looked great- my follicles are still small but they are coming along at a nice pace. We don't want them to get big too quickly or they will have to cancel the cycle.

My estradiol went from 20 on Thursday to 202 today. So that is a nice rise- and I'm sure it will quadruple by next visit!! Thank you all for the sweet emails and comments on Facebook- they keep us sane as we get through this last IVF stimulation.

I turned in my FMLA paperwork to Human resources this afternoon- just waiting to see if they are going to approve it- I should find out really soon. Also, have not heard anything about the job opportunity that was calling and checking my references last week. Just trying to be patient.

I am still planning on being out of work from the egg retrieval (which should be about Feb. 24) until April 4, 2011 on my 5 week leave.

I go back on Thursday morning to get checked again and I will keep you posted!!!

Happy Valentine's Day

Yes it is the day of love..... all things hearts and flowers and red......

Speaking of RED- I just started my period! Yes I did- right in the middle of my stimulation. If you remember from this post, I did this last time I was stimming. I just called my favorite nurse Bethie- and she assured me not to worry. I go get checked tomorrow morning at the clinic- and we will assess then. She said worse case scenario is that we retrieve the eggs and fertilize them, then freeze all of them and do a transfer under a highly controlled cryo cycle. Ummmm that's not exactly what I want to do, but I will do it if it means not losing anymore of my babies.

Lord- please make this right and make it stop bleeding. This is not the time. And the weird thing about it all is the fact that it TOTALLY goes against everything we know about hormones. IE I am injecting all these drugs which increase my estrogen level to superphysiological levels, which in theory means you should never have a period- because you start when you have the big drop in estrogen and progesterone each cycle. So why someone tell me does MY BODY DO THIS????? It is so jacked up that seriously its no wonder I am never getting pregnant!!

I am trying to just keep the faith and know that it can all still work out. There is about 8 days before my retrieval and another 5 days before the transfer- so trying to chill...... take a deep breath in ...... and trust Him!

Well I am still at work and now I have to go inject my 5 shots before my class begins in 1/2 hour at 5:30pm. Yes I have to teach ALL DAY on Valentine's Day and don't even get to see my precious Sweetness. But I do love you boo...... more than you'll ever know. You are the reason I stay sane in all of this- you are my calm in the storm- my most precious gift!!! Your wife I will forever be. You truly are the love of my life!

The stimulation is underway......

Yes the stimulation is underway, tonight will be night 3 of stimming. I am taking 5 shots a night- and boy are my ovaries letting me know they are there! So here we go..... this is the last time I can put my body through this. But we feel really hopeful and I am trying desperately to hold onto that little bit of hope that is rising again.

I have not heard anything about the job- and I have another possibility in the works also- really praying the Lord is moving me on to bigger and better things!

Please pray I can make it through this next week of stimulation- which is typically harder on me than most women due to many reasons particularly my neck injury. The hormones exacerbate my injury and my pain meds can not get me out of pain when on these high levels of hormones. So that is what I am dealing with- and I am VERY willing to do this one more time if it meant I could give my Sweetness a child, and make us a family.

I will keep you updated after my follicle scan on Tuesday morning.

IVF #5 is underway......

So this morning we awoke to 3 inches of snow here!!!! That was a huge surprise! Needless to say it put a bit of a kink in the morning commute to the clinic for Baseline Day- but nonetheless we got there. Blood work and an Ultrasound later- we were in the office signing paper work and such.

So then when I called the phone tree tonight to see how much medication to inject tonight, they actually want me to start stimming tomorrow night. I will be cycling on Tuesday and Thursday and Saturday to accommodate my teaching schedule. So they don't want me to stim for over 4 days before being monitored.

Also something great happened today, I have a real good possibility of getting a job locally that I have been applying for and praying about. They actually called a reference today and are verifying my credentials, so I am soooo hopeful, and needing a change in my daily venue (if ya know what I mean). I would appreciate my girls praying for me in regards to all this!

Overall a pretty great day, Sweetness and I are feeling soooo hopeful and I am trying to rally the hopes once again in the hopes our dreams can come true!

Will update again later!! Thanks for coming on this journey with us again!

2 days until it all begins.......

Well everything is chugging along as it should. We go to the RE on Thursday morning to get started. Its baseline day for IVF #3 !!! Hopefully my ovaries are REALLY quiet being on all this Lu.pron. I mean it has made me soooooo mean this time- I am so agitated sometimes I even want to get away from myself- weird I know but its how i feel sometimes. I will be so glad to stop taking this stuff.

And the state law in Virginia says that you need an STD panel on both husband and wife once a year- but NO NOT MY CLINIC- they want it every 6 months!!!! Do they realize how much this junk costs???? I mean we already have all negatives from July '10 but no.......we have to get it again. So I told the nurse how much it costs and she told me we could go to the health department and they will do it for FREE!!! Really???? Ive never been to the health department, but Sweetness and I are going there Thursday morning before we head to the clinic for baseline day. the tests take 2 weeks to get back but as long as we have them to the clinic before the transfer we are good.

And one last thing, I called my acupuncturist to set up my appts for next week while stimming. She was so condescending and rude that I can not afford to come as much as she wants me to (at $85 a pop), I called her back and told her that she was creating stress for me in this situation and that I feel like I am going to decline any further treatment. She was apologetic but I still just feel like it is a waste of money that I really don't have. I am trusting the Lord for the outcome of this IVF, not whether I've had acupuncture or not.

Speaking of stress......my job is so stressful that I really can not hardly wait to be off the whole month of March. My job is making me take FMLA to be off, so my doc is filling out the paperwork and I can pick it up on Friday- hopefully my work will approve it. I just really can not work for this place any longer- the lady that is over me is so nasty and rude. She literally has me in tears most days. So I have some leads on new opportunities, please pray that something will come through and I can get out of this very unhealthy environment.

Other than that, Sweetness is healing, and improving everyday from the fall 3 weeks ago, its still a work in progress but we appreciate all the prayers! I will update as soon as we find out on Thursday what our real plan of action is for this our final attempt at a family through IVF!!!! thanks again for all the love and support- we love you all!!!