Friday, August 6, 2010

Heartbreak

Well as I sit here with my heart breaking, I am wondering why this is not going smoothly???

I started bleeding about an hour ago. Yep, that elusive period that I have not had, has decided to show up after 5 days of stimming meds. This is like unheard of!!!! So I called the clinic and had the doc on call paged, she calls me back and I basically told her I want to be seen at the office tomorrow. She has me coming in at 10:30am, so we will see. But obviously my body is so messed up that it is having a cycle in the middle of stimming.

We will probably regroup and start all over. But seriously, I am not happy with my care at this clinic. I LOOOOVE my old RE, but she is 3x as expensive as this clinic. I am so torn, but I will be having a conversation with my RE tomorrow. I just paid you $20 000, I want to be treated like I AM somebody. Stop brushing off my concerns as just chatter messing up your plan. I know my body, I also have a doctorate in medicine, so I know what I am talking about.

The weird thing is that at dinner tonight I said to Sweetness you watch I feel like I am going to start bleeding. And sure enough, my body goes awry!!! The doc on call said "well you are just throwing us all for a loop" and I responded, "That's why I am there, my body is abnormal in cycling, you guys should have never let this happen."

So tomorrow we will see what they say, I am sure we will regroup and begin anew next month or so, but gosh this is so frustrating. I posted on my face.book status "Sometimes when God presses you into the depths of grief, He wants you to worship Him there. Lord Jesus, please heal this aching in our hearts!"

I will update more when I know something! I covet your prayers......

3 comments:

  1. OK, Heather, I'm sorry, but all I can say is darn! That's not what I really said, but better not put on this what I really said. I am so sorry. Girl, my daughter went thru this, and finally gave up as it is just too expensive, and she's 42. Will be 43 in November. She had a daughter by her first husband, but wanted so badly to give her 2nd hustand who had never been married and has no children a child, but
    he accepts Holly's daughter as his. But I really never prayed for her like I have you, as I've never known anyone who has no children to want one like you and your husband do. I remember bleeding with my last child (my precious daughter) and I thought I had lost her, but she's 42! So maybe you'll get good news tomorrow. I just pray so. You and your husband NEED a child, Lord! Praying earnestly for you, girl! I love you. marion

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  2. Oh sweetie....not what I wanted to read. :( I hope you get good news. Thinking and praying for you! (((HUGS)))

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