A Look back at 2009!

I thought I would the opportunity this New Year's Eve to look back at the good, the bad, the ups and downs and oh the many, MANY blessings that I have been blessed with this year. This is probably the longest post I have ever done, filled with many pictures, so please grab your favorite cup of java and let's get started.

JANUARY- truly a HUGE month, so busy, but Sooooooo happy!

On Jan 17, 2009 I married my best friend. He has been truly an amazing gift from the Lord. I can't believe we will celebrate our 1 yr anniversary in 2 weeks! Here are some pics of that glorious day!

It was seriously the coldest day of the year! It was only 13 degrees out, notice the ICE in the background on the fountain! Brrrrrrrr
A beautiful shot.
My BFF Kate and her precious daughter Katianna. She lives in Minneapolis and I sure miss her. One day sweet Kate we will live closer! Thanks for being my maid of honor!
And anyone who reads this blog at all knows, my Sweetness LOVES Clemson. Here is his groom's cake....."The Paw says it All!"
Thank you everyone who made our day the most magical and beautiful day we dreamed of!

And after every great wedding, is a fantastic getaway called a honeymoon! My Sweetness booked us an amazing trip to Colorado to go snow skiing! Awesome!

Here we are walking the streets of Vail.

A shot of us on the slopes in Breckenridge!We even met RiperRoo !

Sweetness booked us a magical sleigh ride in the snow, complete with hot chocolate!

We posed in our condo before we left!

Then we came home to a house full of tons of presents! We had a ball opening them all up! Thank you to everyone who blessed us that day and all year! Precious memories. I will never forget.......

Then on Jan 29th was my 33rd Birthday. I felt like we were celebrating all month!

We went to dinner with my Mom and Dad at PF Chang's.

FEBRUARY- I started off the month taking my first trip ever to Utah. My job had their National Sales Meeting there in Park City, good times!!

I got to snow ski again! Wooo hoot!

Then we all celebrated at our good friends Robin and Mark as they became husband and wife!!! AND they just found out yesterday they are expecting their first baby!!! Love you guys!

Then the next couple months of Spring kind of flew by........ just settling in to married life.

JUNE- I prepared for my Sweetness's big 40th Birthday for months! Finally on June 9th- he went over the hill with an all day celebration!!!

The cake I had made for him, Snoopy the flying Ace!! He LOVES Snoopy!

We went para sailing earlier in the day....so fun!

He was pretty happy about all his presents! Just LOVE him!JULY- The month I started this blog! When I look back at all the posts, it really is a nice way of "journaling" so to speak!

Also, My sweet Mom had her knee replaced in July. She had a tough recovery but looking back now, she is sure glad she got it done. I am too, she is not in so much pain all the time. The Lord really had His hand in so many things with regard to this surgery.

And in July.......we had our first IVF. Here are our two precious ones that we lost in the first IVF attempt. I know they are in heaven with the Lord, but it does not make it hurt any less when you look at them.......

AUGUST- We remodeled our guest bathroom......It sure was some back-breaking work, but we are happy with how it turned out.

SEPTEMBER- We purchased new furniture. We have since gotten rid of this coffee table and purchased a neat leather ottoman that stores things inside. Very Comfy!

I also took another trip out West to Arizona for another National Sales Meeting. It was sooooo hot in Scottsdale, but very posh!

OCTOBER- I was let go from my job, but it sure has turned out to be such a blessing! I knew at the time that God had something great in store for me, it was kind of exciting to see what it would be. We also started IVF #2 with our frozen embryos.

NOVEMBER- One of the highlights of the year was going to the Clemson game with Sweetness. He just loves his alma mater and we both LOVE college football! We had an amazing time and I will never forget this amazing experience.

AND...... we had our second IVF transfer on Nov. 19th with these three precious embryos. Again it was negative. To say we were heartbroken is an understatement, but as with ALL things, we must keep going and keep our faith. I know all 5 of my precious babies are in heaven, loved and happy; but oh how my heart aches for them. I loved all of them.

DECEMBER- The best time of the year!!! To get us started and get into the Christmas Spirit, Sweetness and I went to Busch Gardens and saw ChristmasTown. Awesome!!! Here are some highlights.....

And also, I landed a wonderful new job as a college professor, teaching Anatomy and Physiology. The Lord really has blessed us with this opportunity, and I feel like I am making a real difference. I love it way better than sales, and not so much stress. When I left my last job, my company car went with it, so it was time to buy some new wheels. Here is a pic of my beautiful 2010 Toyota Camry. This is a sweet car, and I am enjoying it!

That brings us to CHRISTmas! Truly the best time of the year! My BFF Kate sent me a surprise package to my Mom's that I found under the tree. Thank you Kate! I sure do miss you and KK- and am so jealous of all that snow you have!!!!
And Sweetness wanted a Clemson Snuggie ever since we saw them on TV. Well here he is trying it on for the first time. Funny thing is, I ordered him a Clemson one and me an Alabam Roll Tide one at the same time. Well his came in like 4 days, I still have YET to get my Alabama one! But at least the important one came!
And something we will never forget.....Sooo funny! The day after Christmas, my mom and dad were taking my grandma's car down to her, well it was stuck in the mud in their side yard because we have had like 126" of rain this year......Seriously nothing but mud here in VA. Well me, Sweetness and Mom all were pushing on the front of her van while my dad tried to put it in reverse and well what you see below is what happened.

We laughed and laughed, I just had to take a picture of my mom! Love her!

And a final shot of me and Sweetness. He is my most precious gift!
So there you have it, our year in review. What a crazy one it has been!

I think I have experienced the highest-highs and lowest-lows this year on our journey, but it is our journey together. In our broken times, it is when we find more of HIM, it is when we see how far we have come and what we have left to work on. Our journey to parenthood is not over, we have no idea where we will be next year, we could still be in this same place or have a baby in our arms and their stocking hung on the mantle. But through it all we WILL believe in our Lord, His Sovreignty and His Will.

Through the highs and lows, the great and the not-so-great, I feel His grace fall like rain on my life. I still believe in His faithfulness, I still believe in His Truth, I still believe in His Holy Word......and even when I don't see........I STILL BELIEVE!!!!

PS- I know many of you "lurk" out there and dont comment (like I do too on some blogs) but if you have enjoyed reading this blog, please leave a comment- I would love to see who is really reading all my ramblings!

Christmas Town at Busch Gardens

Well I am FINALLY getting around to posting our trip to Christmas Town at Busch Gardens!
It was really a lot of fun, and Sweetness and I really got into the spirit of the most wonderful time of the year! I will leave you with a whole slew of pictures to scroll through, without much commentary from me haha..... I am working on a great post for tomorrow about 2009 and what it brought into our lives!!! Stay tuned.... and enjoy Christmas Town!

An awesome candy tree in a bakery!

We decided to ride ONE ride, due to my severe neck injury. I can not ride roller coasters anymore. But This was us on the Merry Mixer and boy was it fun and soooo CCCOOOLD!!!!

My Sweetness under the most beautifully lit tree......

This was the Waterford Crystal tree. Every ornamnet on her was like $65 because they are all made from Waterford Crystal!! So pretty!

We saw real emperor penguins. So cute! The one on the right is actually sleeping!

We hope everyone had a wonderful CHRISTmas and HIS love was made real to you again!!!

Merry christmas!!!

We are over at my parent's house for Christmas, so I still can not post my pictures. Just wanted to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas! Christ has been so good to us this year. I came up with a cool idea, I am going to do a long post looking back at this amazing year in our lives, to be posted on New Year's Day!

Stay tuned! Love you all and Happy Birthday Baby Jesus!

Does it ever get better?

I know I am supposed to be posting my pics of our trip to Christmas Town and my new car. But tonight, I am trying to hold onto my faith. A family member called tonight to tell me she is pregnant. And bless her heart she has known for awhile- she's 3.5 months along- but she did not want to tell me until I got pregnant with this last IVF cycle. Well we all know how that turned out...... She was so kind to call me herself, and really tried to take my feelings into consideration, and if you are reading this, I really appreciate it. I really do.

But after I hung up the phone, Sweetness came over on the couch and sat down next to me and just held my hand, and well the tears started, and I just sobbed.

I am so happy for her, I am just so sad for me.

God never promised that life would be fair, but man I feel like I am the only one wanting a baby so badly. I really am enjoying my new job, they are keeping me so busy (hence I have not gotten around to posting promised pictures), and I really am trying not to focus on my infertility too much, but when these announcements come like all of you have experienced when you are still waiting, it hits the heart like a dagger.

Lord Jesus, help me tonight please. Have mercy on my heart. And my sweet husband is aching too, for a child. Would you please give us understanding, give us your heart, give us PEACE. I beg of you........

A New Job!

Hey peeps! Well things are definitely looking up these last few days! Today I landed an awesome job as a college professor! I am soooooo excited! Nothing like jumping right in though.....classes start on Monday at 8am! So needless to say I have lots of homework this weekend!

I will be teaching Anatomy and Physiology as well as Microbiology. I am up for the challenge. The Lord has really blessed me and I give Him all the praise for this awesome opportunity!

Tomorrow Sweetness and I are going to "Christmas Town" at Busch Gardens. This should really solidify the Christmas spirit for us, as it is now frrreeezing here!

Sorry I have not taken any pictures of my new car- I will post them tomorrow with pictures from Christmas Town! Have a wonderful Christ filled weekend!

Emotions

Well sorry I have been quiet lately. I just do not have too much to write. Thursday was a good and bad day. I will get to the good part in a minute, but of course the bad was another BFN on our second IVF. I really thought it would work this time. I mean I really did. But it was not in the Lord's timing, and it is so hard for me to understand why. It seems everyone is pregnant or has their newborn. Thursday night, I was listening to praise and worship music and the tears began to fall. I think I sobbed for about 2 hours. But I did feel better afterwards, there was so much bottled up inside that needed to get out.

I told the Lord how much I wanted all 5 of our babies that we have lost, I hope they know how much we wanted them. And again I prayed for patience and to yield to His will in our life. I do feel okay now. I am still looking forward to my first Christmas married to Sweetness. He really does make life worth living. He is so wonderful and supportive through all this madness.

And now to the good. Also on Thursday I had my second interview for a job as a college professor teaching Anatomy and Physiology as well as Microbiology. It went awesome. It really could not have been better. So the last step is on Tuesday I meet with the President of the University. If he likes me I guess that's it. They have already called and said they were working on making an offer letter! So it looks like I have gotten this job and meeting the President is just a formality.

Since I have had a company car for the last 7 years, when I lost my job in October, I lost my car. Well Sweetness and I have been looking for about a week. We narrowed it down to a Honda Accord or a Toyota Camry. They really are about the same and great cars. After Sweetness test drove them both, he said he was more comfortable in the Camry. So yesterday we purchased a 2010 Black Toyota Camry. It really is an amazing car! The ride is incredible! So this has lifted my spirits too! I will post some pictures of it next time.

But that is about all the news. We have an appt with Dr. Robin on Thursday to go over this failed cycle and see what she thinks may be the reason it did not work. Also see what she suggests. But we are going to have to wait for awhile to do anything else. We have spent $25,000 dollars and have no baby. The baby fund is dry. Maybe the Lord will intervene. Only time will tell.

Oh and thank you to all my family and friends who have called and sent sweet messages of encouragement. It really means a lot. We are doing fine and will bounce back. After all, it is the most wonderful time of the year!!!

Ending with a Scripture:

"While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn."

-Luke 2:6-8

AGAIN.....

Well as I predicted the beta was negative today. That's all I can really say right now.